I had a weird dream last night...

I hate that phrase. I cringe when someone walks up to me with the statement "Oh man, did I have a weird dream last night!". I don't care, it really didn't happen, and it is going to be boring. They then go on to tell you an elaborate story complete with large hairy dogs, pink unicorns and their deceased Uncle Boo Boo come back to bring them a message regarding how hippo blubber can turn back the evil grip that time has on your face.

They go on like this for almost 10 minutes. Ten minutes you could have spent doing something else. Like not listening to them tell you about something that didn't really happen.

And then some of folks get mad at you because of their dream. Like the time they caught you cheating on a math test while wearing those nasty UGG boots in their dream.

I mean, do you really think I would wear UGG boots in real life?

Lowery Park Zoo - Tampa

Pics from our family's spring break holiday. Lucky for us Mr. Hot Pilot hails from sunny Tampa Florida so visiting family is always a beach vacation.

This is how we roll

If you ever wondered what it is like working in such an academically sound research institution with many highly educated and intelligent people all working for the betterment of today's trauma victim, look no further than this email I sent out to my fellow colleagues upon learning that our once sick co-worker would now be joining us for an intense day of research :


From : Carrie
To : Core Research Group
Subject : Josh will be in

Due to a miraculous recovery that can only be attributed to good health, proper nutrition and a hefty infusion of H2O and bacon, our brave Josh will now be joining us today.



While he will not be joining us at his regularly scheduled time, we can all thank each other for the well wishes sent his way that have assisted in his being brought back from the brink of death, just in the nick of time.



Congratulations on your speedy and efficient recovery Josh! If only the rest of us could hold dear just a little bit of the awesomeness that you possess.



Sincerely and with much shock and awe,



~Carrie



**And if you weren’t a believer before, you should now fully understand the wonderful healing powers of bacon, America’s favorite fruit. There really is nothing in the world better than bacon. Nothing.**

Carrie A. Awesomeness (not my real last name, but it sure as heck should be)

Clinical Research Assistant

CORE Research Group

R.A Cowley Shock Trauma Center

University of Maryland, School of Medicine


From : Allison
To : Carrie
Subject : Re : Josh will be in

Truly the world is not ready for the gifts that Josh possesses. We must keep his skills secret, safe, lest the petty jealousies of the ignorant masses steal him away to rend him limb from limb, to realize, all too late, that Josh’s gifts cannot be possessed by any other.


Allison


P.S. The first inkling of the coolness that is Shock Trauma was noted while shadowing Dr. Stein during rounds in October of 2006, when the team nutritionist began extolling the virtues of bacon ….

My (angry) thoughts exactly

I don't make alot of money. I am just beginning to pay back my student loans and I have yet to really start my life. So when I heard about the furloughs being brought against Maryland state employees (of which I am one) I was ticked. Didn't they just pass a crapload of slots that were supposed to bring in a Donald Trump sized amount of money for education, healthcare, Sheila Dixon's kid's college fund and other things? First and foremost, I did not vote for slots. But the rest of Maryland felt they were necessary and now I still have to pay consequences.

When I found this cartoon on PolitickerMD.com, I thought I should just go ahead and share.




(you can find the original page here)

December is lurking

It is the end of November. This means a few things. A) I will need to be changing my masthead rather soon. B) Christmas is coming to rob me of all monies saved thus far. C) The end of NaBloPoMo is here and D) I will soon be turning 28.

And that just sucks.

In honor of the ending of November, I am going to take the night off, go to bed early and sleep in late tomorrow.

Until next time...

Makes me, like, so happy!

Today was the day that I had to pack my boys up and send them on their way down south to Texas where the weather was sunny and warm with a chance of spontaneous rainbows and possible light shower of Skittles falling from the sky.

I know that they aren't going to miss me nearly as much as I will miss them. Especially after our conversation on the way to the airport.

Munchkin was in the backseat practising his whistle (he loves the 'cat calling' whistle, and I am just waiting for him to do this just as a buxom blonde walks by) and after remarking on his whistle, decided to fill us in on how he learned to do such a thing.

"I learned how to whistle one day while I was in the bathroom. I sat on the potty and taught myself how. I was, like, so happy!"

And, like, so am I.

The only mouse I like...

My boys are finally here, so I feel as though I have every right in the world to take a day off.

Instead of words, I will leave you with what I believe will be my newest obsession/collection and will certainly pass this info along to Mr. Hot Pilot for christmas options.

Head on over to The House of Mouse to check out the entire collection. Here are a few of my faves :

Heating things up

So tomorrow is the day that my boys will be flying up to the cold, arctic heart of Maryland. I must say that I feel badly, yanking them out of their 70 degree bliss down in the decrepit desert that is Del Rio, Texas to bring them up to a place where just standing outside for a few minutes will freeze your noobies off.

I reminded and reminded Mr. Hot Pilot to pack their heavy jackets, but for some reason I get the feeling that we will be making an emergency pit stop at the local Old Navy to outfit Munchkin in something heavier than "spring weight" cotton.

Oh and did I mention that Mr. Hot Pilot (and Munchkin too) is Puerto Rican (and a super hot one at that!) and hails from Tampa? And that he will turn the heat on IN THE SUMMERTIME if he deems it necessary? Yeah, he is going to die at my house.

I currently live with my parents (because I am a) too cheap too lonely to live alone; b) cheap loving my address; c) a raging freeloader not down with the economy and d) waiting patiently for a ring on my left hand not moving out until I marry Mr. Hot Pilot) who like to keep the temperature at a chilly 68 degrees.

Mr. Hot Pilot will attempt to physically harm me (and by harm I mean TURN THE HEAT ON IN THE SUMMER) if I dare accidentally, possibly, maybe fall into the thermostat on his wall and potentially hit a button that might or might not have lowered the temperature to 74 degrees. Yeah, its kind of like that. So needless to say, I had better drag up some blankets, quilts and an extra space heater for my boys, lest I find icicles hanging from their nose hairs in the morning.

I am, afterall, a fabulous hostess!

That Pun Was TOTALLY Intended

The war is back on between Mr. Hot Pilot and I. We are constantly going back and forth about who's town/state is crazier and I believe I have totally found a story that will pickle your beets when you read it.

Now Mr. Hot Pilot does not actually hail from Nebraska, however he spent his not so good years in Omaha while stationed there and I believe we should count all of the places we have lived in our war of weirdness. (I have lived in Maryland and Pensacola, Florida. He has lived in Florida and every other backwards city that side of the Mississippi.) I should also note that Mr. Hot Pilot still owns a house in Omaha, which has now been on the market for about 18 months. Why? Because who in their right mind would want to live in Omaha? (Commence the not-so-happy Pro-Omaha comments....now.)

Today's bit of weirdness includes butt humor. So if you can't handle a good butt humor story or were brought up to respect the finer things in life, then you are boring and might want to direct your attention here. Otherwise, the story goes a bit like this:

So there is some 35 year old guy in Nebraska who has found that normal, everyday, run-of-the-mill graffiti is just not his thing. He wants to express himself in a more elaborate way, experiment with a different medium. That medium is his booty and some lotion/vaseline. He then skips around town to local churches, stores and the occasional school to press his bunky cheeks up on the window for some poor sap to come across the next day and clean up.

(Read the rest of the story here.)

CharmCityChica = 2; Mr. Hot Pilot = 3 The war continues...

The Skies Are Alive With Rainbows and Fairies

Could it be? Is it really true? Have The Airlines heard my plea over ridiculous airfare? Have they read my rant and lowered their prices to accomodate the butts of not only Munchkin but Mr. Hot Pilot on their flight?

Highly doubtful. Ok, entirely ridiculously doubtful.

But for some reason, the clouds opened up, the birds flew back up from the south and started singing show tunes, a rainbow landing at The Hippo's doorstep swept across the sky, the fat man across the street put on a damn shirt and the diamonds encrusted on 50 Cent's chompers aligned. Air Tran dropped their crazy prices by about $180 bucks and my boys will now be joining my family and I for thanksgiving dinner.

Thank goodness for automatic emails sent directly to my inbox from every airline in the Eastern United States. One small victory for this girl.

Oh, and by the way?



Eat this, and You. Will. Die.

Stay away from my danger zone!

Today was travel day. One of many travel days I have gotten to have since meeting Mr. Hot Pilot. I am exhausted and today was one dumb thing after another. Let's just say by the time I got off the plane I looked and smelled like someone threw up on me.

And with that I bid you adieu for the night as I am going to snuggle with my sleepy man and watch Jon and Kate plus Eight before crashing like a soccer mom in an SUV for the night.

More tomorrow...

So Obama won....

But this is what made me happy.

Day 1 of NaBloPoMo

Today is the first day of writing one blog per day for a month. I'm both excited and slightly intimidated by such a prospect. Am I excited? Yep. Am I nervous? Heck yeah! Did I eat all of the Reece's peanut butter cups out of the halloween candy bowl? You'd better believe it!

Some days may be boring and useless blurbs, while others may be humorous, fascinating or downright anger inducing. You be the judge.

As for today, I am going to leave you with a belated halloween photo of a rather awesome pumpkin from up in the TRU.

Consider this a happy belated halloween or the earliest Happy Halloween 2009 of the year.

Enough to make me wet my pants...

After spending lots of time with my munchkin, I realize just how amazingly funny he is. Kids really do and say the funniest and silliest things with a reckless abandon I could only dream of having.

I went to pick up munchkin from school today and of course asked how his day was. He began prattling off about the monarch butterflies and then proceeded to tell me all about the "goosebumps" show he had watched the previous weekend with Mr. Hot Pilot. When we got home we pulled out all the work he did in school the previous week, and included was a little book called "all about munchkin" where each of his classmates answered questions about munchkin such as his favorite food and what he wanted to be when he grew up. I was asking him I'd he was friends with the kids (he is as he is very personable). He said yes to each child except for one little girl named Ana. When I asked why she wasn't nice (his words) he said very matter of factly "she drew a picture of me peeing on the ground, and then got a yellow light from the teacher.".

I couldn't control the eruption of laughter that followed.

We then discussed what he wanted to be when he grows up. When I asked him he said "an astronaut and a comet" without blinking an eye. I of course asked him if he knew what a comet was and he said "yeah, a shooting star", his face saying "like, DUH!".

Between his fart jokes and his little matter of fact blurbs, my munchkin keeps me in stitches.

Never a dull moment. I wouldn't have it any other way.

A bit of sweetness in a rather bitter world.

It has been one of those days. No scratch that. One of those weeks. Not sure why I feel so blah, but maybe it has to do with the fact that the weather is gloomy, a co-worker at my old pharmacy job was killed by "gun accident" and I really hate it when someone doesn't make it in the trauma bay and you have to hear the grief stricken cries coming from their spouse. It just isn't fair, and it just shouldn't happen. When I first began working in the Trauma Unit, I remember listening to the snarky comments a few of the nurses or residents would say. I remember remarking once "how disrespectful!". I was told that sometimes you have to have a bit of humor in order to not let the tragic cases get to you. I didn't think I would ever agree...but maybe I do. I can honestly say that I couldn't be a doctor as I would never be able to leave work at work and disentangle myself. I am an empathizer through and through and while I try not to let it all get to me, sometimes it just does.

I came across this rather sweet picture and I don't care if it is photoshopped or not, it is just what I need today.


(thanks must go to Mr . James Danziger at "The Year in Pictures" - thank you for your post which brightened my day!)


I hope everyone is safe and cozy in their homes and with their loved ones. I think we should all find those that we love, near and far, and give them an extra "I love you, you mean so much to me". You never ever know when it is time for them to go on to bigger and better things.

Cherche la bouche

"Narrator: Here in southern Texas, they have an additional problem...
Crow: Texans."

I decided earlier today that I wanted to get a burrito from California Tortilla up the block from the hospital and since I didn't feel much like getting ganked, I took my co-worker with me. We decided to wear our lab coats since it was still kind of drizzling outside, and we didn't want to get too wet.

As we were walking down to the burrito place, we saw some inner city folks packing up their wares (re - vending machine food) for the day. The woman suddenly (and very snarkily) yells "Hey, look at the interns!". (We of course are not interns, but I suppose we were too young to look like bonafide researchers)

I came dangerously close to yelling back, "Hey, look at the street vendor!" to which one of two things would have occurred :

1) I would have been stabbed in the neck
2) I would have been shot point blank in the eye

Hard as it may be, you have to know when to keep your yap shut around these here parts. Gotta love Baltimore.

Music to my wheels

"Lisa: How do we stand on fuel now?
Crow: I'm for it."

Crazy news story of the day via foxnews.com :

Officials to Pave Over Music-Making Asphalt
Saturday, September 20, 2008


LANCASTER, Calif. — Residents of northern Los Angeles County are not grooving to this music.

Lancaster city officials said this week that they're paving over a quarter-mile strip of asphalt grooved to play the William Tell Overture when auto tires speed over it.

The road was completed this month as part of an ad campaign for Honda. It's engineered to play the overture — also known as the theme to "The Lone Ranger" — at perfect pitch for motorists driving Honda Civics at 55 mph.

But neighbors aren't amused. One says the road music sounds like a high-pitched drone. Another says it keeps him and his wife up at night.

Lancaster officials plan to pave over the grooves Tuesday.

Worthy of a dirty look

"What's a giant eye going to do, pick you up and wink you to death?" - Joel

Where I work we have a certain uniform of pink scrubs that we wear everyday. The trauma center that I work for is known for their pink scrubs. Since I don't have to get in the muck and yuck with patients, I tend to wear a regular t-shirt over top of my awesome pink scrub pants to try and jazz it up a little and just wear my lab coat over that. So while I was walking from the parking garage to the trauma center, two younger guys followed in step behind me. I couldn't help but overhear their conversation as they were certainly not being very discreet. They were discussing how the trauma center is the only hospital around that makes their nurses/doctors/researchers wear the pink scrubs, and you can always tell if someone works there. Then, with me being the only pink scrub wearing person in the vicinity, I heard one guy go to the other "Yeah, those pink scrubs are the most ill fitting scrubs I have ever seen".

All I have to say is the stink eye I shot him when I turned around was very much warranted.

Martha, Martha, Martha

Standard sitcom joke landing on runway seven..." -Crow

So have you heard of the new show with Martha Stewarts daughter and her daughters friend called "Whatever, Martha!"? Basically the two young women sit down to disect each of Martha Stewarts television segments - and not in the kind, loving, daughterly way either. Think more along the lines of "Mystery Science Theater 3000" with a twist of snark and venom. Rather interesting if you ask me...

But I did a bit of looking, and apparently Martha herself is onboard with this. They are using old "Martha Stewart Living" shows from the late 1990's to early 2000's. Still might be a good watch though.

Plan? What Plan?

"You're really stupid if you get hit by a car after the apocalypse."
-Crow.

So I'm sitting here at work and I hear the alarm go off with a soothing robotic voice saying "The Fire Alarm has been activated, follow your safety plan".

What the heck is my safety plan? Not so good....