What all women desire during nights...

I was clearing out my spam box today when I came across an email with the subject "Update Request" and the line "What all women desire during nights". Instead of risking the healthy (re - actually functioning) future of my computer and clicking on the attached site, I decided to ponder just what it is that I request and desire during nights. (Right about now my mother and father who both frequent this blog are probably doing one of two things : 1) hitting the back button as quickly as they possibly can or 2) turning bright red, looking around and reading further out of morbid curiosity).

No worries though. I have a cleaner perspective on what I desire out of my night. And here they are :

1) My dog is weird. I think we have established that here and here. On occasion in the middle of the night, Lucy will wake me from a dead sleep with high pitched crying and kicking (yes, KICKING) of the wall for a drink of water. Recently however she has been wanting more and more water so that after I have gotten myself back to sleep, she wakes me up again with both the kicking, crying AND tossing of water dish into the wall. What a baby.

So what do I desire on these nights? An automatic water dish for my spoiled little dog.

2) I like my bedroom cold at night when I sleep. I love to snuggle under my squishy down comforter and find all of those super cold spots in the sheets. There is a problem with this however. My boyfriend is a supremely hot (temperature and otherwise) Puerto Rican who likes to keep the temperature in the house near 80 degrees. On the weeks that I am down in the third world country he calls home, we tend to have thermostat wars - and by wars I mean I sneak the temp down to 74 and then he catches me and cranks it back up to the point where it is so hot I can barely breathe. In other words, he always wins. ALWAYS.

What is it I desire on these nights? A cold bed and warm man.

3) I have gotten myself used to sleeping with the white noise of a fan for quite some time now. It all began back when I lived in a noisier part of town and was used to all of the traffic driving by my bedroom window at night. Strangely enough, when I moved back in with my parents I had trouble sleeping in their extremely silent house. I remedied this problem by running a fan at night - giving me both a colder room and the white noise I needed.

Back to my super-hot Mr. Hot Pilot.

Mr. Hot Pilot is a pilot (hence his name). His sleep is obviously quite precious to him, especially on the eve of a day of flying. Mr. Hot Pilot has gotten quite used to a supremely silent room at night. So while he has no problem falling asleep, I have a huge problem doing so. And so here is our solution (seriously, I kid you not...here goes...)

What do I desire during these silent nights? My hot pilot to snore.

I know. I can't believe it either, but sometimes in relationships you must compromise.

I'm fairly certain that had I opened that saucy message that not only would I have been taken to a world of clothing challenged folks who know "just what I want" but I would have also infected my computer in the way that a freshman girl looking to make lots of "friends" infects her latest victim.



So what do you desire "during the nights"?