This is how we roll

If you ever wondered what it is like working in such an academically sound research institution with many highly educated and intelligent people all working for the betterment of today's trauma victim, look no further than this email I sent out to my fellow colleagues upon learning that our once sick co-worker would now be joining us for an intense day of research :


From : Carrie
To : Core Research Group
Subject : Josh will be in

Due to a miraculous recovery that can only be attributed to good health, proper nutrition and a hefty infusion of H2O and bacon, our brave Josh will now be joining us today.



While he will not be joining us at his regularly scheduled time, we can all thank each other for the well wishes sent his way that have assisted in his being brought back from the brink of death, just in the nick of time.



Congratulations on your speedy and efficient recovery Josh! If only the rest of us could hold dear just a little bit of the awesomeness that you possess.



Sincerely and with much shock and awe,



~Carrie



**And if you weren’t a believer before, you should now fully understand the wonderful healing powers of bacon, America’s favorite fruit. There really is nothing in the world better than bacon. Nothing.**

Carrie A. Awesomeness (not my real last name, but it sure as heck should be)

Clinical Research Assistant

CORE Research Group

R.A Cowley Shock Trauma Center

University of Maryland, School of Medicine


From : Allison
To : Carrie
Subject : Re : Josh will be in

Truly the world is not ready for the gifts that Josh possesses. We must keep his skills secret, safe, lest the petty jealousies of the ignorant masses steal him away to rend him limb from limb, to realize, all too late, that Josh’s gifts cannot be possessed by any other.


Allison


P.S. The first inkling of the coolness that is Shock Trauma was noted while shadowing Dr. Stein during rounds in October of 2006, when the team nutritionist began extolling the virtues of bacon ….